Mental rigidity, inflated ego, self-righteousness

      Three of the most important defining characteristics of most psychologically violent men are mental rigidity, inflated ego and self-righteousness.

      When a woman challenges such a man by leaving him, he typically decides – once and for all (mental rigidity) – that she must be a “whore” – the only reason he can think of that any woman could ever want to end a relationship with him (inflated ego). He then sets out to prove that his opinion of her is right. When he cannot find anything real to accuse her of, he typically tries to provoke her into making mistakes that he can use against her; failing that he makes false allegations against her, going to great lengths in order to make the allegations stick, for example by doing everything imaginable to ruin her reputation. And all the time he sees it as his right (or even his obligation!) to chastise the woman who dared challenge what he thinks is his undisputed superiority and unquestionable right to control her – a right that he believes was given to him once and for all as of the day when she gave him her heart, and even more so when she became the mother of his children.

      The violent man’s self-righteous persecution of a woman who has dared leave him takes many shapes. The techniques used are uncountable. In future articles I will discuss those that I am the most familiar with: They include for example: creating all kinds of problems in the woman’s daily life ("spokes in the wheel"), various tricks that aim at isolating her ("Isolating the victim"), unwelcome visits with verbal and/physical attacks, threats, telephone harassment, slander, false allegations. Frequently this kind of man will even resort to hurting his own children in order to get back at their mother, while all the time blaming her for forcing him to hurt them. He will also typically carry on an endless fight for custody based on various vague and uncorroborated allegations ("Fighting for custody as harassment method").  

Articles in chronological order